One of the most annoying Outlook BCM error messages is the message that BCM can't find a database on the server. It's annoying because you've already used the BCM database tool to set up the database and share it. So, yes, the database exists on that server.
The Computer SERVERNAME does not contain any shared Business Contact Manger databases. Please confirm that a shared Business Contact Manager database is stored on the computer.
When you get this error it means one of two things: that SQL is not listening on TCP/IP ports or it can't find the database.
Recommendation: Do not enter a different name for the BCM database. Use the database name that the BCM database tool suggests.
If you are using the database name BCM suggested and can't connect, verify the SQL service is running.
If the SQL service is running, verify the TCP/IP protocol is enabled and correct TCP Port assigned.
To check the TCP/IP setting, open the SQL Server Configuration Manager and expand SQL Server Network Configuration. Select Protocols for the SQL instance you are using for BCM (MSSQLSERVER in my screenshot, it may be different on your system).
If TCP/IP is disabled, right click on it and Enable then try to connect remotely. If it fails or is already enabled, right click on Named Pipes and TCP/IP and disable both. Restart the SQL instance (in Administrative Tools, Services) then re-enable Named Pipes and TCP/IP. Restart the SQL instance you are using once more.
Right click on TCP/IP and select Properties then select IP Addresses tab. If the IP All-> TCP Port is blank, set it to "5356" (high enough so that no other services are likely using it) and restart the SQL instance. If it has a port number, don't change it, but verify the port is not blocked at the firewall. If you changed the port number, make sure it is open on the firewall. (Note, you may only have 1 IP# port listed; I have 8 because this system runs several Virtual Machines.)
You will need to create a user account on the server that matches the computer logon account name for each user who will accessing the database. For example, I log into my computer as dianep and need an account on the computer running SQL server called dianep. The password for the user account on the SQL/BCM database server needs to match the password I use to log into my computer. Don't worry about the domain or computer name used for the log on, the username and password are what matters.
To create the user account or change the password, type Windows key + R to get the Run command then enter control userpasswords2.
Note that, although Windows allows you to change your account name, the name you see on the Start menu may not be your "real" account name. If you changed your user account name previously, your real account name is the name used on your account folder in C:\Users. This is the name you must use for your account on the BCM server.
You cannot use a Microsoft account login on Windows 8 and connect to a shared SQL database. You can share a database on Windows 8 if both computers use a Microsoft account logon.